reblog and make a wish!
this was removed from tumbrl due to “violating one or more of Tumblr’s Community Guidelines”, but since my wish came true the first time, I’m putting it back. :)
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hey good news
there's a specifically designated role in the naked mole rat ecology for "guy who runs off into the wilderness and fucks their way into a stranger's house"
Y'all have no idea how absurdly strange naked mole rats are as creatures
They're cold-blooded mammals that live in a eusocial structure with a queen and drones, similar to ants, bees, termites and no other mammal on the planet.
They barely need to breathe, with a respiration rate low enough to let them thrive in burrows with 2% oxygen, and survive with 0 oxygen whatsoever for about 20 minutes with zero lasting effects.
They live for over 30 years, which is absurdly long for a rodent, don't grow frail with age, and are basically immune to cancer because their telomeres just never shorten.
Naked Mole Rats are rodents that attempted to evolve into bugs, failed, and unlocked the secret to immortality in the process.
my favorite thing about this post is all the people who chose to use the default icon defending themselves in the notes like no stop it just put a picture up
Loving this energy
*wipes tear* they learn tumblr culture so fast . . . the spite . . . the malicious compliance of it all . . . I'm so proud
my one skill is expertly manipulating the shape of the eggs I’m cooking so that they fit perfectly onto my toast every time
Bow down to your king
I can’t stop outdoing myself
Remember that post? The one that said “what if we all have super powers but they’re so mundane we don’t realize?” That post? This is proof that post was right
does gotham even bother with announcing the weather ever. like. is there even a need for a weather channel
would you risk firing the local weatherman and have him snap and buy a cut-rate weather control machine in order to become the Forecaster?
I feel like it could go either way, like ‘same shit as always’ or
‘It’s a sweltering 105 today in the diamond district as Firefly once again takes to the sky, so make sure to pack your fireproof blankets if you’re headed that direction’
‘Now let’s go to Justin live at Robinson Park, heya Justin how’s the weather there?’
‘Well Tami, despite Dr. Freeze taking over we are still above freezing here, sitting at a balmy 45 for the last hour but! Since Batman is known to prioritize putting out fires, temperatures could still keep dropping into the afternoon hours’
‘With the Bats busy do you think Ivy will be the weather factor there today Justin?’
‘I sure do Tami! As you know she’s currently at large, and while she’s normally against global warming I don’t think she’ll be much a fan of this sudden cold snap’
‘We’re going to have to leave it there Justin, we just got word from the meteorologists that a hurricane has started in the Gotham Harbor and is headed for amusement mile, this may turn out to be, no joke for traffic today’
Choose an eternal curse to befall you
Knowledge of the old ones
Monthly werewolf transformations (the wolf can be tamed with skill)
Brought back from the dead as something not fully human
Appearance changed to that of a horrifying monster (your mind is unchanged)
Possessed by a ghost (the ghost can be befriended)
Knowledge of possible far futures (but no knowledge of the near future)
Take the life-force of whoever you touch
The divine right of kings (your fate as a tyrant is written in stone)
Turned into an ageless genderless vampire (you must drink human blood)
Beloved by a faerie (the faerie has no human concept of morality)
Censor bars placed over every human face you see
Your and anyone who spends time around your body is slowly replaced with machine
Reblog to curse your followers and mutuals.
Medical issue has stricken someone in my family but that's not the point of this post. The point is that my mother proclaimed "It's the eclipse that caused this" and for several seconds I was sitting there like :V until she continued "...He was standing out there with his head craned up for hours yesterday and strained his neck."
onbearfeet